Sermon 4/22/07
Do You Love Me? - John 21:1-19
(view lectionary notes for this text)
A few weeks ago I went to see my cousin perform in her high-school’s musical, Fiddler on the Roof. I’ve always loved Fiddler – I had the chance to be in it too when I was in high-school, and watching the show, I found myself sort of singing along in my seat – not so loud to distract those near me of course! Most of you probably are familiar with the story – a traditional Jewish father, Tevye, living in a small traditional Jewish community, tries to deal with a quickly changing world, expressed especially in the pending marriages of his three oldest daughters. In one scene, after Tevye blesses the engagement of his second daughter, Tevye comments to his wife Golde that things are changing – people are marrying for love, not because of arranged matches, the case with Tevye and Golde twenty-five years before.
So Tevye asks his wife of twenty-five years, “Do you love me?” Golde responds, “Do I love you? For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes, cooked your meals, cleaned your house, given you children, milked the cow - after twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?” She continues, wondering, “Do I love him? For twenty-five years I've lived with him, fought him, starved with him, twenty-five years my bed is his. If that's not love, what is?” “Then you love me?” Tevye asks. “I suppose I do,” she responds. “And I suppose I love you too,” he says. They finish together: “It doesn’t change a thing but even so, after twenty-five years it's nice to know.”
This song kept running through my head as I was preparing this week’s sermon. Do you love me? That’s the theme, even if the gospel of John and Fiddler on the Roof approach it from different angles. For Golde, she figures that the love is obviously there – the love she has for her husband is in her actions, her living and giving, shown over the course of the years. The words are nice to hear, but they’re almost just the icing on the cake. The cake – the content – is in the life they’ve shared together and the love that is shown through the way they treat one another and care for one another.
“Do you love me?” That’s exactly the question at stake in our gospel lesson today, and the issues are the same – there are words of love, and then there are loving actions, a loving life. We find ourselves again in this strange post-resurrection time, where Jesus is spending these last days with the disciples before he returns to God and sends the Holy Spirit upon them. These are the last times that Jesus has to prepare them to carry out the ministry that he’s been about for years in such a direct, in-person way. And he’s taking full advantage of this time.
In this unique story that appears in this way only in the gospel of John, Simon Peter, Thomas, Nathanael, James, John, and two others decide to go fishing, but catch nothing. But then, after daybreak, Jesus appears to them on the beach. Jesus gives them advice on a better spot to fish, and suddenly the nets are full to overflowing. After they are done, they go ashore, and find that Jesus has prepared breakfast for them – fish and bread. They share this meal together with Jesus, and then Jesus sits down for a tête-à-tête of sorts with Peter. He asks him, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” “These” what we aren’t exactly sure, but I think Jesus means “these” everything – these other disciples, these fish, this life, this food, your family and friends – do you love me more than all these things? Peter answers him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” “Feed my lambs,” Jesus says,“ and then he asks Peter again, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter repeats his answer, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” “Tend my sheep,” Jesus says, and a third time asks, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” We read that this time Peter is hurt that Jesus asks him again – he clearly must not be convinced of Peter’s answer. So Peter responds differently this time – “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” And Jesus tells him, “Feed my sheep.” He foreshadows with his words that indeed he does know – he knows that Peter is committed to discipleship and that his discipleship will bring him suffering. But his final words to Peter in this passage are the same as some of the first Jesus ever spoke to Peter: “Follow me.”
I can only imagine the inner struggle, the pain, the searching that must have been going on inside of Simon Peter during this struggle. On Easter, when my brother Todd shared a monologue from Peter’s perspective, we imagined that Peter might have felt conflicted about Jesus’ resurrection. Of course, he was filled with joy at the prospect that Jesus was alive. But was he also afraid? Guilty? Embarrassed? Wondering if Jesus would still want anything to do with him? Wondering if he would still be used by God? Used by Jesus for ministry? Was Peter wondering if he’d screwed up beyond redeeming? And so I think it is no accident that Jesus asks him this question, “do you love me?” three times, just as Peter had three times denied even knowing Jesus when Jesus was arrested and tried. It is an act of graciousness on Jesus’ part – he is letting Peter know that he is forgiven, and he’s giving Peter a chance to say out loud that he is committed still to being a disciple. It brings Peter full circle. Yes, he messed up. But yes, there is grace, and Jesus needs to help Peter move on from his self-doubt, move on from wallowing in his own mistakes, and move on to the next chapter, literally and figuratively.
Peter reacts to Jesus’ repeated questions with grief and hurt. He was reliving his denial of Jesus. Finally, the third time Jesus asks Peter if he loves him, Peter’s pain comes through in his words – his frustration is obvious. "Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you." Rev Hubert Beck writes that Peter's fear and anxiety and grief “was that [Jesus], whose knowledge of Peter had so certainly been shown on that dreadful night [when Peter denied him], did not now see how deeply Peter's love for his Jesus was. Or was Peter, perhaps, wondering if he still had "betrayal possibilities" residing within him and he was pleading with Jesus to save him from himself?” (1) Is Peter asking Jesus to look within him and see the truth – could Peter betray Jesus again? Is Peter cut out to be a disciple? Does Peter love Jesus? Really? We don’t know exactly what is going on in Peter’s head, but we can imagine. Jesus was making him face up to what had happened, and they were asking together of Peter – does Peter love Jesus? Really?
Peter wants to say yes. He does say yes, three times, with energy, with angst, with a heart pleading for Jesus to believe him. And Peter wants the answer to be yes. For his ‘yes’ to mean something to Jesus. Jesus tells him – “feed my lambs. Tend my sheep. Feed my sheep. Follow me.” Jesus says that for Peter’s words to mean something, they must be paired with the loving actions of discipleship. And Jesus gives Peter some relief, by indeed seeing into Peter’s heart, and seeing that now, Peter is ready, and that now, Peter’s words are true.
Do you love Jesus? Think back to the scene from Fiddler that I described at the start of this sermon. Tevye asks his wife if she loves him. Can you imagine the desperation or the courage it takes to ask that question? Have you ever asked someone that, straight out, if they loved you? What if Golde had said no? Kept on avoiding answering? Tevye took the risk, because he needed to know. In this passage, God takes the risk with us, and asks us point blank, no avoiding the question, “do you love me?” (2) God wants to know if we’re ready to move on from our failings, our mistakes, and if we’re ready for our ‘yes’ to mean something.
“Do you love me more than these?” “Feed my lambs.” “Do you love me?” “Tend my sheep.” “Do you love me?” “Feed my sheep.” “Do you love me?” “Follow me.”
Amen.
(1) http://www.predigten.uni-goettingen.de/predigt.php?id=172&kennung=20070422en
(2) Line of thinking helped here by Blue Collar Preacher, http://bluecollarpreacher.blogspot.com/2007/04/third-sunday-of-easter-lovin-those.html